5 Effective Guidelines for Fair Fighting in a Conflicted World
Conflicts, arguments and misunderstandings are part of life’s many experiences. We all have to face these difficult situations one way or another. Although life is said to be unfair, we all should strive to be fair even if we are facing conflicts and difficulties. Here are some guidelines to remain fair even in our conflicted world.
1. Let The Other Know How You feel
Stating the facts during a confrontation is important. You should be able to verbalize what you think the other person has done wrong. But one other important thing you need to relay to the other person is how you feel about the situation and what offense has been done. Communicate why his or her actions made you feel angry or agitated. Letting someone know how you feel will allow them to understand you on an emotional level and they too will feel they can share their side as well.
2. Be specific
In some heated arguments, stories of the person’s behavior and the events that took place may be mixed up in the conversation. Organize your thoughts and be specific. Address each event and behavior separately for a much clearer understanding. Throwing many details all at once can cloud the argument and make things worse than they already are.
3. No Personal Attacks
When people are angry they have a tendency to get out of control. No matter how heated the conversation may be, avoid personal attacks and stick to the issue only. Attacking a person by saying bad things about their looks, loved ones, personality or race will only aggravate the situation. Control yourself and always stay rational. Be the better person.
4. Listen to What the Other Has to Say
When conflicts happen, the fault may be by one person to another. But it can also happen that both parties are at fault and they just need to know what they did wrong that offend the other. After you have expressed your frustration about a certain action or situation, be open minded and listen to what the other has to say. And if you realize that you too have done something wrong, be responsible enough to admit it. Be humble enough to apologize and make things right.
5. Find a Resolution
Always remember that the point of a confrontation or dialogue is to find a solution to the problem. You should know when it is over and you should also be able to move on after that squabble. Staying angry and bearing a grudge will only make you miserable. It will also distract you from doing more productive things. You should be able to start anew with the person once the issue is closed.
Life is full of conflicts. We cannot avoid misunderstandings all the time. There will come a point when you have to stand up for yourself and fight. But never forget that you have to strive to be fair and do the right thing. There is always a better way to do and say things.